Posts Tagged ‘philosophy’

How to Get Rid of Personal Problems

Sunday, May 15th, 2011

Everybody has different problems. Out of different readings and watching around I glued together a bunch of ways how to get rid of personal problems.

  1. Write a list of your problems. Self-criticism is a good thing. Self-hating is a bad thing. Sensibly define your problems to yourself. Problem recognition is the first step to solve it.
  2. Behave as those who don’t have this problem. You are unlucky because you do something differently than those who are lucky. Learn from those who succeed. Copy their best features.
  3. Purchase a book or search for the solution of the problem online. How to get a wanted job, how to find a partner, what to eat to loose weight – you can get all this information in the internets or in the books.
  4. Get a thing or a service that solves your problem. Increase the ability to see by laser operation. Use plastic surgery. Do hair attachment. Visit a speech therapist. Make a makeup… If you really need that.
  5. Train yourself. Do exercises regularly to get rid of your problem. If you have overweight, run in the mornings. If you have sexual problems, do Kegel’s exercises. If your oratory is limited, write a blog. If your eyesight is weak, do sight exercises.
  6. Hide your problem. At least temporarily one can hide his imperfection. Chewing gum can hide a bad smell from the mouth. A hat can hide a bald head. Dark cloths can hide protruding belly. Closed lips can hide wry teeth. Deodorant can hide the smell of perspiration.
  7. Pack your problem as personal uniqueness. Maybe you inherited some feature from your family. It’s not necessary to look at it as to a problem. You can look at it as to an originality not owned by the majority.
  8. Draw attention to things that you have best or can do best. Oratory, sense of humor, creativity, career achievements, or loving second half can successfully drown personal imperfections.
  9. Get something that diverts attention from your problem. So what that you can’t pronounce some letters properly; that’s nothing compared to your new car. So what that you don’t have a job you like; you have a cool smartphone. So what that you don’t look like a supermodel; you still dress stylish. Sometime you need just a small thingy to divert attention, be it a brooch, a button or a ring.
  10. Cooperate. Other people solve the same problems. Gang together to anonymous groups or forums online to solve your and others’ problems.

While writing this entry, I uncovered a pile of my own problems and that made me sad. Anyway, I hope this will help to understand your own problems and find ways to solve them.

Games Surgery

Sunday, February 13th, 2011

From time to time I meet people who think that computer games are just a waste of time with no value. Usually those people associate games with ancient tetrises or supermarios, or with some maniac friends counterstrikers who isolate themselves from the real world losing the sense of time and of themselves. Various shootings in the schools of the USA make the situation look even worse.

As I am diving into this sphere deeper and deeper, I will share my opinion with you. It will also partly be the propaganda of gaming with a hope that it will prompt the interest in gaming culture and development, developers will start doing their job more seriously, and we’ll have more games of high quality in the future.

While talking about games in this article, I will mostly talk about video games, but won’t limit myself to that. In my opinion, party games, board games, mobile games, computer games, and playful life in general seem to be related, overlapping and complementing each other. I will look at games from different perspectives: entertainment, education, art, socialization, media, simulation, and job.

Entertainment

Not everyone accepts his days as gifts. Not all jobs are interesting. And even in the interesting jobs there are boring tasks that use your energy. After all people need to relax and run away from every-day problems. So people need entertainment.

People need experiences different from every-day life, stories, videos sounds, activities, and self-expression. Therefore, depending on the possibilities and personal choices, we go to clubs, cinemas, amusement parks, play TV games, and attend different competitions. Video games are one of additional forms providing storytelling and expression via video, sounds, animation and interaction with computer. Additional amazement is given by the newest technological possibilities to manage the system by motion, and to express the special effects not only by video and sound, but also by vibration and smells. Moreover there have been technologies developed to manage computer systems directly by brains through a helmet.

Games help you to reduce stress. Playing games, you can unleash negative energy on virtual opponents, not harming any real beings. The results in games can be achieved relatively faster than results in real life. Achievements release hormone Endorphin which gives the sense of joy. While playing more active partly computer outside games, adrenalin might be produced. While playing you compete with other players or with your own achievements. Excitement is felt. Sometimes it’s not as important to win as it’s important to communicate with each other and the game becomes an interesting way of communication where you don’t need to talk about weather when all the other topics have already been exhausted.

Self-education

School is important not because it’s an obligation. And Diploma is not the main reason to study. It’s necessary to learn all your life. You need to improve not only professional skills, but also many others, so that you could survive personal crises as well as global catastrophes and also that we could create maximal comfort for ourselves and for others.

Games are an attractive form to improve some skills. Games train our brains to manage audiovisual information, interpret it, and react to it fast. The coordination of arms and eyes is improved. Many games tell stories, so many facts are created by imagination of the player as when reading a good book. So games improve imagination too. Diving deeply into a virtual world also increases the attention for one thing for a longer period of time. Every one of us has a sleeping genius and attention to one thing is a way to wake him up. Games also improves logical thinking: we experience causes and effects through them. Games prompt to overcome the difficulties, persistently doing the job till the end. Virtual 3D worlds develop spacial memory and orientation. It’s easier to find out where you are, when you get lost in a big city (proved by my own experience :) ). Games teach to learn to understand more difficult structures than the primary natural ones, for example the forking and overlapping of time, alternative worlds existing at the same time, mutating states of the characters, changing gravitation sources, etc. Active computer games and some mobile games train balance. After-all, the computer literacy is getting better.

Games causes their developers also to be interested in many different spheres. Games are some of the most difficult software products. Usually they are created by big groups of people specializing in different spheres, but the project managers should have basic understanding everywhere. The developers have to understand natural, social and humanitarian sciences and be creative. Besides programming, programmers should educate physics, geometry, 3D modeling, development of artificial intelligence, and user interfaces. Game developers should understand psychology to predict user movements, and sociology so be able to manage gamer communities. The story creators should predict non-lineal possibilities of the script (one beginning and multiple endings or multiple paths to achieve the ending). Sound creators should be able to adapt music to the mood of the moment dynamically like in movies, depending on the players choices. And this is still not the full list of spheres game developers should know. As I am mostly interested in independent games and I am planning to publish them myself, I need to be interested in advertisement and marketing too.

Self-Expression and Creativity

What is the point of art for a human being? We conceive the world through contrasts. The more arguments for different ideas or features we get, the more we choose how to live our lives. Art is a subjective artists view to different things. The more subjective ideas we get, the more objective is our point of view. A game can be a form to convey the viewpoint of its creators. The game becomes an indirect dialog between game creators and game players.

Game itself can be very creative, re-mixing other forms of art, such as photography, 3D arts, architecture, fashion, music, dance, or theater play. Games stand close to movies or interactive video installations at modern-art galleries or at night clubs.

The process of gaming can be creative itself while solving some logical problem. Sometimes instead of normal game flow, the player can use game resources in a creative way making their own pieces of art in social games. Also different modification tools allow to modify the games or create 3D animations called machinima.

Means for Communication

A man is a social creature in an animal body. Like birds we need to communicate.
Therefore, bars and clubs are full of people, we like home parties, we attend different courses, or use facebook. Games are one of the means to communicate with other people.

While playing we communicate both, verbally and non-verbally. By words we communicate when we play together or by turns at a console or with mobile phones. Also by words we communicate at the chats of online games. It’s been said that the bigger part of information is transferred non-verbally by body language. In games the nonverbal communication happens when helping each other to overcome obstacles, competing with each other, sharing or exchanging virtual goods.

Local-area-network games bring existing gamers’ communities together. Online games create communities in themselves. Also gamers usually have their forums where they can share experiences about the game.

Media Form

There is a saying that a picture is worth one thousand words. I will extend it saying that a video is worth one thousand pictures, and a game is worth one thousand videos.

Games are strong media form getting much deeper into the memory because the idea of the game is conceived by practicing. A game can explain difficult things simply, clearly and visually.

One could compare video games to newspapers, magazines, books, comics, publicistic photos, movies and animations.

If the developers want to make an interesting game, they should be always on the cutting edge of actual things.

Safe Simulation of Real-life Activities

Even playful life isn’t a game. There are many difficult, dangerous or too influential spheres, where it’s better to avoid them, for example, martial arts, extreme sports, or stock quotes. Games can simulate risky situations enabling you to try them in a virtual atmosphere and experience just virtual awards and punishments and to decide later if that sphere is interesting for you in the real life.

We can start, pause and stop playing games whenever we decide. In real life, if you want to start something, you need some preparation (courses, studies, or contacts), and when you want to end something, you need to take others’ (family, colleagues, or clients) interests into consideration.

Virtual game world is always simpler than the real world. And you can feel as the manager of your own simple world, where all the rules are clear and all causes have clear effects.

The game can show you two different opinions letting you decide the conclusions which opinion is more correct as it’s done in discussions, debates, publicistic broadcasts and news.

Games can convey artificial reality: what would be if something existed or happened. One can be embodied as avatars of different profession, sex, race or even as things.

Simulation in games can also give profit to the developers, because modules tested on entertained players can be later applied in important software packages, for example, path search in the maps, artificial intelligence, user interfaces and so on.

Way to Get Money

Money is an important means in the nowadays world. Players can earn some money by gambling games or by selling virtual goods. But the most important from my point of view, that the games is the source of money for gamemakers.

The most games today are created for adults and the most players are adult people, not kids. That means that the most players do something in their lives to earn money which can be spent for entertainment.

There are many ways for game developers to get money, e.g. funding, donations, subscriptions, freemium subscriptions, box sales, in-game advertising, microtransactions, virtual currency, server leasing, and merchandise.


I gave you ideas, but no game examples. Anyway, I can give you some examples in the comments on request. The most important is direction what to achieve to get well developed game industry in the future with more open source and more collaboration, little by little, step by step.

Stability in Life

Monday, November 15th, 2010

Why are some people more successful than others? I have been interested in this question all my life. Maybe that happened because my parents were not very rich, o maybe because very often I wasn’t as successful as I wanted to be, or maybe because lots of people told me their unlucky stories and I noticed how much badness and bad luck exist in lives. Therefore I have been always doing my best to learn success from good examples, books, TV, readings on the web, and other resources that I happened to get. The comparison of emotional stability with columns at a book by Alain De Botton made me a big impression.

One column is not stable enough

If the luck of your life is based only on one need where you give your attention, for example, outer looks, money, or relationships with another person, then in the case when this thing falls appart for some external reasons, you might fall into total depression leading your personality to low self-esteem or even suicide.

Colonnade gives enough stability

If your life is based on many activities like human relations, career, social networking, traveling, creativity, hobbies, etc. then in the case of catastrophe in one of the areas, the situation won’t impact on you too much.

You have to educate yourself in all the areas that interest you and not to be afraid to adapt to novelties or create original solutions.

Here I remember an article in which Richard Brandson from the Virgin company mentioned that he started investing into the flights to the open space, because if he had only given all his attention to records, the company might get into risk of crumbling, as nowadays people share MP3 for free on the internet (I can’t find the article now to provide a link to it).

Changes are the only stability.

Me, Myself, and My Imaginary Friends

Saturday, September 4th, 2010

Long time ago I was sunken into high temperature and was dreaming nightmares. One of them was about multiple egos. It was about four o’clock in the morning and everything that previously supposed to be single, exploded into four separate parallel parts. I was turning from side to side in fever trying to perceive those parts united, but I was not conscious enough to glue romantic idealist, libertine adventurer, artistic soul, and boring nerd together.

chicken narcissist test

I learned at University that a human being can be viewed from different perspectives:

  • What you are in reality.
  • How you see yourself.
  • How others see you.
  • How you believe others see you.

Also I would add these:

  • How others believe you see yourself.
  • How others believe you believe others see you.

Dream further! You are not interesting that much to anybody except yourself… :D

In general, it’s worth understanding that how you feel yourself, how you pose, and how you look to others – these are all different images.

I remember a friend Mindaugas from my childhood who was the first person in my life communicating with friends differently than with parents. He was a naughty madcap among his friends, but exemplary polite son at home. Was that double-facedness or just integration?

Moral standards teach you to be yourself everywhere, and that is set off against hypocrisy which tends to be a bad feature. Unfortunately being yourself directly means staying the same as people expect you to be with all your faults, imperfections, and inabilities. What if it’s possible to stay yourself even being different with different people? What if being yourself is not important?

“Which of my images is the real one?” Juste got confused once.
“You are real with all your images!” I noticed.

Some writer Kurt Vonnegut wrote this:

We are what we pretend to be…

or so to say paraphrased:

Fake it until you make it.

In essence, we can be anyone we want, we just need to work on that (ok, maybe some people have better skills to achieve some goals, whereas others have better skills to achieve other goals).

Why is it important to be able to change? That’s because of recognition within groups of people who are important to you. Nobody likes to be alienated. Even those who are pushed away from the mainstream, gather together to groups of abandoned.

Alternatives also belong to groups. All in all, mainstream and alternatives are two opposed groups which are easy to understand for superficial-thinking ones. The world consists of many subcultures and one person might belong to several of them. Even if you feel being an original individualist, you still belong to a group of individualists walking on this planet somewhere among 6 billion people. Being anonymous is also one of the images.

During Rocío’s birthday we noticed this almost unanimously:

Even if you stay at home alone on Saturday evening crying about your miserable life, you still belong to a group of people who don’t go anywhere on Saturday evenings crying about their miserable lives.

Belongings to some groups define personal identity. I am Lithuanian, hacker, blogger, inline-skater, unfortunate game developer, party guy, workaholic, traveler, artist, aristocrat… Because I am from Lithuania, I think about security holes all the time, I live in blogosphere, I belonged to the club of Vilnius’ inline-skaters, etc.

By belonging to a group, a person automatically adds a label to himself, which in some cases might be inappropriately interpreted by other people.

We are what we pretend to be, so we must be careful about what we pretend to be.

With the growth of internet and social networking, self branding became accessible to everyone, not only to the famous ones. Depending on how you represent yourself online, you can be successful or unsuccessful at work or personal life (actually, even before internet, people cared what others thought about them). In order not to get alienated in a group, you need to integrate there. You need to learn the context, take up with it, and by the values of people within the context, find a way to stand out to achieve what you want.

For example, it’s right to start a thread about design patterns in programmers’ forum, it’s right to tell stories about creepy hitch-hiking adventures in a group of travelers, it’s right to show a new skating trick to inline-skaters, it’s right to dive into the ecstasy of flirting and intimacy during a date… But usually it’s not right to mix everything. Everything is in its place and time. All different groups of people have different contexts and you have to adapt yourself to them, unless your purpose is to be distinguished radically and to gain everybody’s attention (until your pranks become boring).

So we all fall under statistics. Businesses use that while searching for target groups. One thing to remember that it’s not always right to put the whole person to the target group. Only specific part related to specific activity can get to the target group. And the parts change in time.

For example, by measuring time, I am 5% of clubber, 12% of web socializer, 27% of programmer, 33% of sleeper(1), and the rest 23% of spontaneous activist and daily-chores doer. So my time distribution at the moment is as shown, but it differs from what there was and what there will be, not necessarily depending on age, but rather on interests and priorities in the surrounding environment.

Regarding online social networks, it is important

  1. to provide a possibility for people to create groups by interest.
  2. to provide a possibility to restrict access to data which should be reached only by a specific group.

I would propagate the openness of information, but then I remember the example at a presentation that a young teacher in New York might not want her under-age students and their parents to see wild-party photos of her gay friends. So everyone should be able to choose how much publicity he wants.

You can look at yourself or the other one as at different parts, or as the whole, or as a part of a whole; and you will be always right. The other question is for what purposes you will use that?


(1) Once again, I declare an outrage that I spend one third of my life just by sleeping! Why are living-beings so non-effective!? There would be so many interesting things to do during that time! BTW, there are some signs sprayed on the walls in Berlin saying “Sleep is commercial”. But that is already another story..

Top Ten Testimonies

Saturday, May 22nd, 2010
  • Bulleted thoughts
  • look
  • important

Sometimes it seems that until you put your plans, ideas, or rules point by point, your life is totally messed up and chaotic. Classified information is easier to understand, to memorize, and to believe in. So we cut the reality into pieces and digitize it. Then we accept it as static and true and start following the items.

However, one should never forget that all bulleted truths are true only in the time and conditions of their creation, having a limited amount of information and being influenced by specific circumstances. That’s because the perception of reality is subjective and partial, no matter how wide it is.

So it’s worthy every once in a while, to take personally important things, which you keep in your mind item after item, then re-evaluate them, maybe add some more, and maybe regroup them. Also I agree with Giedrius, who says that it’s good to have items as the basis which can be used to build other things on top of them.

There are good points about personal progressiveness in the speech of magician and mentalist Jason Randal:

Jason Randal: Stretching, Rewiring & Growing Geometrically from 99% on Vimeo.

My New Eye

Wednesday, March 31st, 2010

By flipping coins I got used to asking myself even more questions. Sometimes the answers are delayed. Why should I believe in randomly given magic? And I don’t necessarily get the right answers to my questions, as they might be right only for a given moment, but wrong later in the future.

I ask myself:
“Is it possible to become famous without being rich?”
“Is it possible to become rich without being famous?”
“Is it possible to become rich staying human?”
“What is humanness?”

My new eye

Personally I am not interested in getting popular by fooling online or collecting millions using the naiveté of other people.

I tried to define some life dogmas for today, but found a much better description of the meaning of life formulated by 209:

Maximal case: create as much as possible making least negative influence for other sensitive beings and environment, and ultimately penetrate to things that are unknown yet. “Creating” means “using ultimate amount of your abilities to reach even more abilities”.

Minimal case: do what you want to do making least negative influence for other sensitive beings and environment.

And then tonight I got up after a strange dream, grabbed a pen and wrote down several objective truths in my opinion (paradox, isn’t it?):

  • All systems have multiple levels.
  • Everything is relative, but principles in small scope can be reused in large scope and vice versa.
  • Also principles of one sphere can be reused in another sphere.
  • The more power you have, the more influential you are, and vice versa.
  • The perception of power depends on values.
  • If you want to change the perception of values, you have to get enough power perceived by currently actual values.

You can decide some examples for those propositions and write down in the comments. And I will further try to combine the definition of meaning of life with these objective truths and will do something good in my life.

It’s Time!

Tuesday, January 12th, 2010

Today I purchased a tablet for drawing. By now, I’ve got all the tools I need for the beginning of game-development career. Also I have enough literature to learn from. I just need a strong kick in the ass and some time. It would be great if I could buy time like in this animation:

The moral dilemmas of the animation remind me the conversation of two rational adults:
“Do you believe in teleportation?”
“Think logically! Would you invest your own money in it?”
“Not my own! But wouldn’t you find a crowd of stupids who would do that?”

It’s the same with time. There are many levels of information to discuss, from individuals to statistics and back to individuals.

Indirectly speaking, you can buy time.. at the expense of other people’s time. You just need to establish a company, hire employees, and do business. By buying other people’s time, you can save your own time benefiting yourself.

Is it bad?

It is bad if you don’t provide sufficient working conditions, psycologically terrorize and frighten your employees, smother the wish to improve and make one’s career, or even overuse people till death. But it is good if your own purposes are such that they help you as well as a lot of other people. It’s good if you choose such human resources (employees) whose purposes will go on the same way as yours and whom you’ll accept as companions. It’s good if you provide possibilities to learn more and to use the received knowledge for the common purpose (even in a competitive company).

So getting back personally to me, I like my job (to create the web), but I am lack of time for going towards my chosen purpose which is to become a game developer famous for games which influence the awareness of society. I keep telling to everybody that time is just as it is and having no time means nothing else than wrongly chosen priorities. Therefore, I think, it’s time for me to rearrange my priorities so that I could spend at least 8 hours per week practicing game development and blogging about that. I am about to define the purposes for myself to achieve in twenty-ten.

What weather have you got there?

Friday, October 16th, 2009

Stop shedding tears that the weather is getting warmer, polar bears eat each other, new diseases spawn around, and mosquitoes multiply. We did what we did. Maybe we can fix something, maybe not. But the most import thing now is to adapt to the changes. Let’s look what good we get from the global warming.

Dandelion

I am tired of brainstorming. I wrote something just to take part in the Blog Action Day. The idea of the action is wonderful, because many writers and even more readers think about important global things at least for a few minutes, whereas usually those global problems are drowned by personal problems and local scandals. Heh.. My intro was kinda controversial as it’s raining cats and dogs outside and the temperature decreased to 3 grad. Have a nice fall!

Adults Only: Physical Violence

Wednesday, September 16th, 2009

A few days ago I started thinking about it somehow. Recently, Andrius wrote that he saw a movie about students who were terrorized by their classmates until they revenged big time (blog post in Lithuanian). Game Producer wrote that he as well as many of his readers liked virtually pestering his friends. When coming back from work, I noticed two teenagers strangling each other for fun. I saw a group of guys with a girl where one of the guys was trying to catch the girl’s attention by destroying different things on the way. Also there were two drunken guys in Hackescher Markt where one of them pushed me with his shoulder. What’s happening!?

I’ll be Sigmund today and state that everybody is lack of sex!

A flashback from my studying times came to my mind. One evening I and my friends were waiting next to a student dormitory for a friend from Lithuanian province. He came down to meet us with bloody fist.
“What happened?” we asked. He answered: “I was going down by elevator, drinking beer, and some loser stood next to me. He said: ‘may I have a sip of your beer?’ I hit that f*cker into the face. He shouldn’t have asked that!”
He was really a strange guy. Whenever he was drunken, he always needed either girls, or street fight (blog post in Lithuanian comparing aggressive soccer fans with spermatozoids)!

Or everybody is lack of attention and tenderness…

“Is it safe in Berlin?”, Justas asked me that week when I had a lot of guests and when we three were going with bare feet through a fountain to the tram.
“It seems safer here than in Vilnius…”, I answered remembering an incident last year when a gang of half-naked sporty young gentlemen were attacking passers-by (and there was not enough place for them in the police car).

Then just at the TV tower a fat-elephant-like Nazi girl left her friends, caught up with us, realized that we are not Germans, hit Živilė to her eye, got frightened of her own behavior and possible consequences, and ran away trying to cover her own shock with laugh. Some blond girl came to the fat one and asked: “What happened there?”. The fat one answered giggling: “I hit that girl to the face!”

I was standing with Justas at a loss. Should we go and revenge or what? There was a police car just behind the corner. Should we go and complain there? WTF!?

Physical violence directed to a person happens very rarely in Berlin. It goes towards things much more often. For example, lately I saw two guys (about 23 year old) with their girls going nearby. One of the guys imagining to be very cool, kicked a placard, went a few steps, and punched an empty bottle standing on a platform, so that the bottle fell down and splintered. Cool, isn’t it!? Probably, it’s all like that because of the German image of murderers in the worldwide context which was achieved after the Second World War and because of German psychological problem about that (blog post in Lithuanian mentioning the German psychological problem). “We are not murderers. We are cleverer. We are just strong.”

Ex-colleague told me once that when he was a child, he went to Great Britain by bus with his classmates. They stopped at some province. And then the local villagers (even the adult ones) threw stones at them as if they were world’s worst criminals. But they were just children.

Where is all this aggression from?

Long ago I saw a publicistic broadcast in Germany about some disease which affects many teenagers for a few years. The symptoms of the disease are hyperactivity, aggression, and anger. Patent’s brothers and sisters suffer most of all in big families.

Ehmm.. I am totally against physical aggression directed towards people. But then why do I like playing GTA, Postal 2, Prince of Persia, and other games which have features of aggression?

Life is beautiful.


UPDATE. This is an excerpt from an interview with Karmapa Lama, Trinley Dorje, the only senior Buddhist leader recognized by Beijing, the Tibetans and India; after telling that hip-hop perhaps is one way of him being a 21st-century person:

Is that why you play war games on your play station because many might say it’s inappropriate for a Buddhist monk dedicated to peace to play war games?

Well, I view video games as something of an emotional therapy, a mundane level of emotional therapy for me. We all have emotions whether we’re Buddhist practitioners or not, all of us have emotions, happy emotions, sad emotions, displeased emotions and we need to figure out a way to deal with them when they arise.

So, for me sometimes it can be a relief, a kind of decompression to just play some video games. If I’m having some negative thoughts or negative feelings, video games are one way in which I can release that energy in the context of the illusion of the game. I feel better afterwards.

The aggression that comes out in the video game satiates whatever desire I might have to express that feeling. For me, that’s very skilful because when I do that I don’t have to go and hit anyone over the head.

Sincere Naiveness vs. Problematic Perfectionism

Wednesday, September 2nd, 2009

I almost learned beeing alone as comfortable as with friends. I don’t create connections with people whose faults look to me bigger that their merits. I never take the first step unless I am sure that I’ll get what I want. I never start a conversation if that’s not necessary. I accept either nothing, or everything, but no failures! I am still deep into my psychological sh*t. I am afraid to look weak or a loser.

Yesterday I was counting airplanes and satellites in Club der Visionäre when I got hungry and decided to buy a pizza. I started eating it with beer and saw a girl sitting in front who turned to me when she smelled the food and felt hunger. She suggested her friends to order a pizza too, but they refused to do that. I could share mine, because it would be enough for me. But I was too shy to start talking to her. Neither my German, nor English is perfect. But I was sure, she would really like the offer. “If she turns to me once again until I count to 60, I will suggest her a piece”, I thought. One, two, three… Twenty four… She stood up, turned to me and looked for a second. Should I be a bourgeois or a socialist? She was about to leave with her friends. Should I offer her a piece of pizza!? She was moving away. I didn’t suggest it… FAIL! I stayed a bourgeois. The one who had a solid meal doesn’t care about the hungry one.

I remembered the words of a 40-year-old fellow passenger in a train going from Klaipėda to Vilnius:

No matter how much you achieve in your life, the most important thing is not to get puffed and stay sincere.

Maybe someday…