The Indian John says: “There are friends for season, for reason, and for a lifetime!”. Nowadays, in the times of virtual social networks, many of us have tens and even hundreds of friends, whereas some of them haven’t been seen in real life at all and some of them have been communicated just in a few sentences. Some collect friends and the others weigh them and remove from lists. But one’s relation with others is a very important factor of surviving, especially when you are in a foreign country.
I remember the times of studies when three, four, and even five of us lived in 220 in ICE. Furthermore, there were guests visiting and parties from time to time… And a couple of times I was left alone when the flatmates had their vacations and I still had to work. I started feeling crazy perhaps on the third evening. I was thinking in voice or singing the readings to hear at least some sound. I started intensively invite friends or visit them… I need socialization. You can express yourself only via the other human beings. Your arts make no sense if there is nobody to whom you could show that. Watched movies and read books make no sense if there is nobody with whom you could share your impressions. The told joke makes no sense if only walls have heard it. Many lonely people have pets just to fulfill the lack of conversation. The WWW functions so successfully also for the same reason.
I am not the one who can easily get acquainted and become friends. But while observing the lives of the more communicative ones, I notice that one can achieve much more and much easier using connections rather than in other ways. Using relationships one can find required things, the wanted job, new ways of entertainment, new friends, lovers, partners, delusions, and wisdom… You shouldn’t necessary be a profit searcher or the exploited one. Sometimes you can be a middle party who connects two people, noticing that one has exactly what the other needs. Anyway, I have already started practicing the creating new relations and keeping in touch. Although I know many positive and interesting people, I couldn’t tell that everybody becomes good friends very soon. I have no purpose to become friends with all the World. But it is easier to have many acquaintances than just a few, because if one of them shows you her/his back, there is enough support in the life anyway. Maybe that’s a plastic attitude of consumerism, but c’est la vie(1).
The first step to enhance the circle of acquaintances is communities. Friends from the yard, classmates, university associates, and colleagues at work are the communities where almost each of us has participated in. In addition there are different hobby groups, clubs, and schools of extra education, i.e. the School of Arts or the Inlineskaters’ Club in Vilnius which I attended. The ones who like traveling could check the communities as like-minded autostoppers’ club, the international travelers and hosters, national societies abroad, and similar sects. The firsts step after entering them will be to bring a TV to the community (© Vilius), but that’s not a problem to anybody, is it? Later the further connections are created via the acquaintances and friends in various parties, public events, and elsewhere.
What about the web? The virtual social networks are good for keeping the real connections when it’s impossible to do that directly because of long distance. But it is doubtful whether the web is a good sphere to create new relations. Do you think that you have no time for extending the circle of acquaintances? It might be true, but if you have sung everything until this sentence to your dog, then it’s the time to lock the stable door before the horse is stolen and to find some more friends.
1 (fr) That’s life!
Tags: lifestyle, philosophy, traveling
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